i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
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