Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
