I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
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