dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
