dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
