Are we in a gay sports bar?
Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
Screwed.edu
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
