Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize