Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
