Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
There was a lot of him and a little penis
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
We had sex on a dog bed..
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize