I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
