I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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