I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
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