whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Randomize
