He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
