That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
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