I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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