I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
