I'm drive I can fine osifer
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize