i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
