Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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