belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
He better not be in your backpack
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
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