Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize