All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
