I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
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