So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize
