I molested 6 butterflies tonight
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
So. Much. Porn.
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