I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize
