I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
