No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Randomize