Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Everclear isn't food dammit
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
