yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
