He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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