She announced her abortion via fbk
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize