weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Randomize