I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
