We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Terrible idea I love it
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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