I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
