when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Randomize
