my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
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