I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Randomize
