Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
dude i'm inner monologue high
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
