He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
