You smell like stripper and shame
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
