shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I need water and some morals
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
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