Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
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