i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
