Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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