I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
we're making bets on your personal life
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Randomize
