Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Randomize