ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
