Are we in a gay sports bar?
apparently the secret to your success is patron
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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